supporting you on your journry to motherhood
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Contact us
Tel: 01289 382790
info@berwickdoulas.co.uk
North Northumberland and Scottish Borders Birth Support

The journey to motherhood – a spiritual journey of discovery

visitationThere was a time when every expectant mother could rely on her extended family to give her help and support throughout pregnancy and labour and particularly with her new baby. As an expectant mother today you may not be given that chance to enjoy your journey to motherhood because of the pressures that society places upon you. Relatives or friends who might once have helped may live far away, the need to earn money might keep your husband or other family members from being as available or flexible as they might like to be, and you may have to juggle maternal and wage earning roles earlier than you would really want to.

This is where the doula as your birth companion comes in. That magical moment when you realise you are pregnant – when you first share this knowledge with another woman – when you talk to her and discuss your hopes, dreams and fears – and the long weeks of waiting together: all these are stages in your journey to birth and motherhood. Spending time with a woman who has also given birth herself can be very reassuring, for her emotional, practical and physical support will give you inner strength. This inner strength can make a marked difference to how easily and safely you eventually deliver your baby.

When a woman gives birth she goes through a spiritual journey of discovery, when she both faces and survives some of her deepest fears. As labour progresses she withdraws deeply into herself and discovers hidden resources to help her focus on bringing her baby gently into the world. The doula helps nurture that spiritual strength by ensuring that the birthing space is quiet and private and dimly lit, by keeping the woman babypositive and by encouraging her to follow her instincts. In this gentle and spiritual atmosphere, the mother comes to feel she is sharing a very intimate experience with women the world over. Her passage into motherhood becomes a celebration of life.

‘To carry a child in your body, to make choices between alternatives, to give birth … is not a medical event. It is a major life transition.’
Birth Your Way: Choosing birth at home or in a birth centre. Sheila Kitzinger DK 2001

quote She gave me so much confidence in the early days with my new baby quotes


quote I will always be grateful that I had this support in the first few weeks after giving birth. The strength that she gave me through her support set me up for the months that were to come and had an incredible impact on my bonding with my children.quotes

What I offer:

Before Childbirth

supporting a pregnant ladyOur first meeting together will be to establish a relationship and to discuss your hopes and dreams for your birth. You may also use the time to talk about previous experiences or fears that you might have.

'I was able to talk through my problems in a personal way, that would possibly be distressing for my husband as he would not understand how I was feeling (and would try to find solutions).'

I will then arrange one or more meetings prior to the birth. During these meetings we may talk about birth plans, options and pain management. Whether you choose to have a home or hospital birth, I’ll support whatever you want.

‘Employing a doula gave me the confidence to choose a home birth.’

I’ll encourage you to question everything so that you feel in control and are able to defend your choices, should you need. We may also talk about such practicalities as buying a pram, organising your shopping or running your home both before and after you have the baby.

‘I found the whole time of pregnancy very satisfying, knowing I could share my hopes and fears with another woman.’

During Labour

holding handsYou may call me at any time of day or night when you think you have started labour. During your last week or so, there are often false alarms and it’s good to talk to someone when you’re not sure what’s happening. I’ll come to your home as soon as you wish, to support you in early labour till you feel you’d like to call the midwife or ring the hospital to say you’re coming in.

‘She made me feel very safe and reassured me that I would cope and she would be there to help me in any eventuality.’

As a new mother, you need to have someone present during labour who trusts in the birth process and who will radiate confidence. I’ll be there to offer help and suggestions to support you with your breathing, relaxation and positioning. I’ll encourage your husband to participate in the birth at a level at which he feels comfortable. I want you to have a positive experience, but I also understand there is a time and place for medical intervention. Sometimes the birth plan may not go quite as you planned and you need someone to help lessen the guilt that some mothers feel. Sometimes you may need to transfer from home to hospital, but I will still stay by your side. My training will help me to provide support while remaining calm and objective.

'She reassured me that I was doing well and doing the right things. She constantly massaged my back and my legs as did my partner. I did not need any pain relief as this was the best possible pain relief I could have had.'

I will help to reassure you both, giving advice and offering general moral support. This support and reassurance will be continuous, particularly if I know you are working through negative memories of a previous birth. I’ll communicate with medical staff on your behalf and can offer an independent objective view when decisions have to be made. However, you must remember my support is not in a clinical role - that is the job of the midwife or medical staff.

Once your baby is safely delivered, I will stay with you and your family until I am sure you are comfortable and settled, and will leave as soon as you are ready for some privacy.

‘The birth went exactly how I wanted it to, which was very much due to the confidence I felt knowing that she would be there for me. She really has been and continues to be an inspiration.’

After Childbirth

mother holding baby The next day (or later that same day) I will visit you to talk over the birth and help you settle at home with your new baby. Talking about the birth helps you to reflect on your experience and leave you with positive memories.

‘The birth went exactly how I wanted it to, which was very much due to the confidence I felt knowing that she would be there for me. She really has been and continues to be an inspiration.’

Adjustment into motherhood can be difficult, as parents often have no previous experience of newborn babies until they are holding their own. This can be quite unsettling or worrying, and may create feelings of isolation and abandonment. If you decide to employ me as a postnatal doula, I will be available to support you for as long or as short as you require, often for just a few hours a week.

‘I just felt ultimately supported in whatever I wanted to do.’

I will be on hand to care for you and your newborn baby, providing breast feeding support and advice, looking after the older children, conjuring up some meals, running errands or helping keep your house clean so that you can concentrate on recovery or spending time with your husband. I will be there to free you up to do nothing but be with your baby and other family members, or to take the baby so that you can sleep, if that's what’s needed. I will be your ‘peace of mind’ factor.

‘She gave me so much confidence in the early days with my new baby.’

Cost baby with open mouth

My services will vary greatly according to the needs of the mother and her own situation. So, for example, a first time mum’s needs may be quite different from that of a woman who has children already.

First Visit:
Our initial meeting is to see how we would get on with each other and whether you would like to employ my services, and so there is no charge.

Birth Doula:
I usually arrange to see you at your home at least twice before your due date. If you wish I can also come with you to any of your medical appointments, attend classes or visit the hospital with you. You can contact me by phone or email at any time.
I will be available for you from approx 38 - 42 weeks of your pregnancy. I’ll be there to support you when you need me, from first labour till after birth. I’ll visit once or twice after the birth to see how you are and talk it all over. £280 inclusive (4 payments of £70)

Postnatal Doula:
After the birth I come to support you at home in any way you require. The hours and days can be adapted according to your personal circumstances and may last up to six weeks. Or you may only need me for a few hours in total. £10 per hour

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